Let’s talk about intentional spending, not the Pinterest-perfect, “stop buying lattes” version, but the real kind. The kind where you sit down, look at your bank account, and realize your money isn’t going where you thought it was. The kind where you’re tired of financial stress, even though you’re technically making enough.
I’ve been there. I had a good job, paid all my bills, and still ended up wondering why I never felt like I was saving enough. I wasn’t blowing money on luxury vacations or designer bags. It was small stuff, random Amazon orders, eating out when I didn’t feel like cooking, and constant “treat yourself” purchases that never actually made me feel better.
Eventually, I realized I had no plan. I was spending emotionally, out of habit, not with intention. And that’s where this started.
If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Where did all my money go?” or “Why do I feel guilty after shopping?”, you’re not alone. I want to walk you through how I went from impulsive to purposeful, and how you can too, by aligning your dollars with what actually matters to you.
What Is Intentional Spending, Really?
Here’s the simplest way I can describe it:
Intentional spending means you know where your money’s going, and you feel good about it.
Not guilty. Not regretful. Not confused.
It means:
- You’re clear on what matters to you.
- You spend in ways that support that.
- You stop spending money just because you’re bored, sad, tired, or pressured.
That’s it.
Why I Stopped Spending Without Thinking
Here’s a real snapshot from a few years ago:
- I had a closet full of clothes, but nothing I actually liked wearing.
- I bought coffee out every morning, even though I had a perfectly good coffee setup at home.
- I’d order takeout because “I didn’t feel like” cooking the groceries I already had.
- My savings account was not growing
It wasn’t about being irresponsible. It was about being unconscious. I was spending without thinking.
I realized I was treating money like an emotional pacifier. Bad day? Buy something. Bored? Online shop. Happy? Celebrate with a splurge. And none of it felt good anymore.
So I decided to try something new: spend on purpose.
Ask This Before Every Purchase
Before we dive into strategy, here’s the one question that changed everything for me:
“Is this getting me closer to what I actually want, or further away?”
That one question helped me start thinking like a person in charge of my money, instead of someone constantly reacting to emotions and sales.
Here’s how I break that down in real life.
My Real-World Intentional Spending Checklist
I still use this today. It’s five quick questions I ask before buying anything over $20 (or anything impulse-y).
1. Why do I want this right now?
If I’m tired, anxious, or procrastinating something else, I usually don’t actually want the thing, I want to feel different.
2. Does this line up with what matters to me?
For me, that’s travel, freedom, health, and a debt-free life. If it doesn’t support one of those, it’s a red flag.
3. Would I still want this next week?
If it’s a “yes,” I’ll wait and revisit it. I’ve lost interest in 90% of impulse buys this way.
4. What’s the actual cost of this decision?
Not just the price tag. What does it take away from something else I care about? That $100 impulse spend could be a weekend trip I’ll enjoy more.
5. Do I have the money for it, without using credit or sacrificing essentials?
If I’m borrowing from future me to afford it, it’s not worth it.
How It’s Played Out in Real Life
Here are two very different examples, one I walked away from, and one I leaned into.
The $200 Jacket I Didn’t Buy
I was scrolling late at night when I saw it. A stunning fall jacket from a brand I love. Normally $300, on sale for $199. The clock was ticking. I nearly hit “buy now.”
But I paused.
- Did I need it? I already had two similar jackets.
- Was I shopping because I was feeling restless? Yes.
- Was it aligned with my goal of saving for a trip? No.
I left it in the cart.
One week later? I didn’t miss it. And that $200? It went into my “Italy 2026” savings fund.
The $150 Cooking Class I Said Yes To
When my friend invited me to a pasta-making class, my first instinct was, “I shouldn’t spend money right now.” But then I ran it through my checklist.
- It aligned with my value of spending quality time with people I love.
- It supported my long-term goal of cooking more at home.
- It would bring lasting joy (and practical skills!).
I said yes. I still think about that night, and I make pasta at home now!
Intentional spending doesn’t mean saying no to everything. It means saying yes to the right things.
How I Built This Into My Daily Life (Without Going Extreme)
Let me be clear, I still buy fun things. I still order takeout sometimes. But I do it on purpose, not out of habit.
Here’s what helped:
Weekly Money Check-ins
Every Sunday, I take 10 minutes to look at where my money went the previous week. That’s it. No shame. Just awareness.
“Fun money” budget
I give myself a small monthly budget for fun stuff, clothes, dinners, treats. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. That helps me say “yes” without guilt and “no” without FOMO.
Values list on my phone
This might sound cheesy, but I keep a short list in my Notes app of what actually matters to me. When I’m tempted to impulse spend, I read that first. It grounds me.
The Benefits You Don’t See in Your Bank Account
Yes, I saved more money. Yes, I paid off debt faster. But the real payoff?
- Less mental clutter. Fewer “ugh why did I buy that?” moments.
- More confidence. I trust myself to handle money.
- More freedom. I can say yes to things I really want, because I’ve said no to the stuff I don’t.
- More time with friends. Because I was intentional about experiences, not things.
I don’t feel guilty spending anymore. And that’s huge.
How You Can Start Intentional Spending Today
Here’s the good news: You don’t need a perfect budget or spreadsheet to begin. You just need to start noticing.
- Define what matters most to you.
List your top 3-5 values or goals. Examples: travel, family time, health, home ownership, debt freedom. - Track your spending-without shame.
Just notice. Where’s your money actually going? Does it match your values? - Use the checklist before each purchase.
Tape it to your laptop. Put it in your wallet. Make it a habit. - Reflect weekly.
What did you spend on that felt good? What didn’t? Adjust as needed. - Celebrate intentional wins.
Every time you don’t buy something you don’t need, that’s a win. Every time you save for what matters, that’s a win.
Start Where You Are
If you’re reading this thinking, “That sounds great, but I’m just trying to survive right now,”, I get it. I’ve been there.
You don’t need a full budget spreadsheet or a no-spend year. Just start with this:
- Track your spending for one week. See where your money actually goes.
- Pick one category to be more intentional with, like food delivery or impulse Amazon buys.
- Use the checklist. Even asking just one of those questions can change your habits over time.
Go Start Spending With Intention
You don’t have to be perfect. Just, be honest with yourself about why you’re buying. Make sure it aligns with what you actually care about. Pause. Think. Decide. Don’t guilt yourself, just get curious.
You don’t need to overhaul everything overnight. But you can change your relationship with money, and your life, by choosing to spend with purpose.
Every dollar is a decision.
Spend it in a way that supports the life you actually want, not the one you think you should have, or the one Instagram is selling you.
If you want to feel more in control of your money, it starts with paying attention. One purchase at a time.
Tell me:
- What are your biggest spending triggers?
- Have you ever made a purchase you regretted, or one you’re so glad you made?
Drop a comment below!
With love,
Bri & Cat
Related Posts You Might Like:
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The Frugal Living Mindset: 5 Beliefs That Will Change the Way You Spend Forever
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